The Christmas Loofah…A true Christmas tale/I made it!

One year of the Loofah.

What can I say about the Christmas loofah?
It has been on our tree for many years, and has even worked its way into a French class at Middlebury in the summer of 2009.
I think the assignment was to act out a family scene.
I’ll give it to you in English here, with my French version underneath at the end. (Note that I said my french. It’s probably not entirely correct.) The reason it is a bit choppy in English is because, due to my limited French skills, I’m not the most eloquent in that language, and I just translated it from French today.

A living room.
A large Christmas tree, naked.
A large box of ornaments and decorations.
My mother takes an ornament.

My mom: “Oh look! A snowball! It’s cute, isn’t it?”
Me: “Yes mom.”( I don’t look. I’m a bit annoyed because I have a sister and two brothers but is always only me that “gets” to decorate the tree each year, sometimes Debbie.)
My mom: “Who made it? You? Billy? Maybe Debbie?”
Me: “I think I made it. (I make very nice things. I look at it.) Mom! You’re wrong! That’s not a snowball. It’s not an ornament. It’s a loofah.”
My mom: “A loofah? No, you’re lying.”
Me: “No, I’m right. You use it when you take a shower. It’s true!”(I take it)
My mom: “You’re crazy.”
Me: “Look at the tag. Its says, Made in China.”
My Mom: “No, I know that you made it!”
Me: “And I made the tag that says, Made in China?”
My mom:“Maybe. You were very smart at five years old.”

The discussion is over.
And every Christmas, there is an imposter, the loofah, on my Christmas tree.
Here are some pictures to tide you over before the French version:

Loofah and Davey

Loofah and little Kathy Ellen

Loofah and Debbie


Loofah and Billy, who is a bit older in his picture and it's more like a trophy than an ornament, but who's counting?

As a Christmas joke, I actually made my mother a loofah, crochet style, from this pattern.

The loofah that I actually DID MAKE for my mom!

Ok, if you’d made it this far, here’s the French version(some accents may be missing..I forget how to make some of them on the computer.)

Un salon.
Un grande arbre de Noel, nu.
Un boit avec beaucoup de décorations et ornements.
Ma mere prend un ornement.

Ma mere: “Oh! regarde! Un boule de neige! C’est mignon, non?”
Moi: “Oui mama.” (Je ne regarde pas. Je suis énervante parce que j’ai une soeur et deux freres, mais il est toujours seulement moi a décorer l’arbre. Chaque année. Parfois Debbie aussi.)
Ma mere: “Qui l’as fait? Toi? Billy? Peut-etre Debbie?
Moi: “Je pense que je l’ai fait. (Je fais les choses tres jolies. Je le regarde.) Mama! Tu n’as pas de raison. Ce n’est pas un boule de neige. Ce n’est pas un ornement. C’est un “loofah.”
Mere: “Un loofah? Non, tu mens.”
Moi: “Non, j’ai raison! Tu utilises quand tu prends un douche! C’est vrai!”
Mere: “Tu es foue.”
Moi: “Regarde la étiquette. Il did: Faites en Chine.
Mere: “Non! je sais que tu l’ai fait!”
Moi: “Et j’ai fait la étiquette que dit: “Faites en Chine?”
Mere: “Peut-etre. Tu étais tres intelligente a cinq ans.”

Le dispute a fini. Et chaque Noel, il es un imposter, la loofah, a mon arbre de Noel.

First off, the word loofah in french class caused quite a stir. If you know Simone, my french teacher, you’d know why. She said it wasn’t proper french, but I think that there is simply no way of translating it and getting the point across.

And if you made it all the way down here, then you get a special treat that I really had to dig for:

Billy decorating the tree...see the loofah at the bottom?

A story that it takes two languages to tell.
I’m exhausted.

until next time, craft on!
Krafty Ellen


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